I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
