something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
