You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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