I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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