Banned from zoo.
Again?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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