you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
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