I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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