Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Never underestimate the power of titties
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
