I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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