cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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