Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
