i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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