you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
