I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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