You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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