dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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