Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
worst night to have a conscience
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize