yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
