Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
