She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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