Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Randomize
