Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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