Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
