I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
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