Fine. I'll sleep in my office
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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