The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
