So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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