I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
the night ended with taco bell and tears
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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