Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
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I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
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you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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