we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
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