Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
