So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
