Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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