Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
