You're so nebulous sometimes
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize