we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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