I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
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I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
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I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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