you would pick up someone in the library
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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