Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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