Just mADE A PArabola og urine
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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