i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Randomize
