It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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