you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
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I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
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There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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