Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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