they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
