if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize