I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
