Those balls look pretty dangerous.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
