gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
me + whiskey = a bad person
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
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