i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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