It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
